Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Scott Island

My son has trouble. This trouble stems from his head being firmly lodged in his ass. This tale of woe comes in two parts.

Part One
A couple months ago my husband attempts to drive Scooter to school in Bellevue. I say, "Scooter, what exit do you get off the highway?" My husband shushed me. "I'm sure he knows how to get there." o_O

An hour later my husband gets home and tells me that Scooter was so busy babbling about D&D that he didn't notice the exit go by and they ended up in Downtown Seattle. They turn around and head back over the bridge etc and Scooter gives more wrong directions. All the times I've driven him to school his head is in his ass.

My husband programs the college into my GPS as "Scott Is a Fucking Idiot"

One day for shits and giggles I let the GPS direct me to the college just so I can hear the GPS bitch say the name. She says "Approaching Scott Island a Fucking Idiot...on right"

Part Two
My husband comes home for a week and I take time off work. Ergo I'm not driving Scooter to school on my way to the office.

Monday: Scooter gets dressed and sits in the living room waiting for me to notice him. Sits through his first class, then goes out to take the bus. Misses the bus because he forgot to wind his watch

Tuesday: My husband drives him to school without incident.

Wednesday: Misses morning classes again. I drive him to afternoon classes on my way to drop off the car for repair. I rip him a new one on the way.

Thursday: I warned Scooter the night before that the car was still gone and he needed to get up early etc to catch the bus. Scooter tries to catch the bus and fails. There is an elaborate story as to how this happened. He missed the bus and then it missed him.

Friday: I drive him to class.

And then this fine morning. Doocheroo just overslept and I left him there. But first, I took a picture:


  1. I definitely need to add "doocheroo" to my vocabulary. Educational as always!

  2. I say you give him a curfew of 1000 pm when he has school the next night. A "I'm his room, lights out, nothing on, lay in bed" curfew until he figures out that his school is more important than his D and D. But that's just me.

  3. Oh when does ScooterFail start Season 1? This as an "outsider" is highly entertaining and riveting! I feel your pain though as a Parent, but your experiences have me chuckling!

    Awesome GPS location on your Marine's behalf!